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Ever feel like you don’t know how to relax? I, too, have a toxic relationship with relaxation and I discovered why. 

While sitting on the beach in Cancun, I had a revelation. I want to have a great life for myself, but I’m not going to get it doing what I’m doing right now.  Why? Because I don’t own my time and if you work a 9-5 job, you probably don’t own your time either! 

It’s not ok that we have to ask for permission to be sick, to visit family, or to go on vacation. I don’t know about you, but I’d like to live on my own terms. 

In this episode, I reflect about that with you. This is not scripted. These are my raw reflections on how owning our time really affects what kind of life we live. 

So, as you listen I want you to be picturing what your ideal life looks like and how not owning your time may be getting in the way of that. 



  • [00:01] How I discovered that I don’t know how to relax (Do you?)
  • [03:15] This must be what a true vacation really is. 
  • [05:07] I found out why I am unable to relax, even on vacation!
  • [06:30] Worrying about going back to work. 
  • [07:47] The one thing I hate about corporate jobs. 
  • [08:23] If you work at a job you don’t love, you probably do this. 
  • [10:15] If you say “I don’t have enough time”, this is the truth behind that.
  • [12:48] Do you have a conflict in alignment? 
  • [15:13] Have you ever thought about these 5 big questions? (how are we fine with this?!)
  • [20:39] Planning to take back control of your life. 
  • [23:45] The best way to move out of a rigid structure. 
  • [26:48] What does your best life look like?


Key Takeaways To Tune In For

  • If you find yourself anxious in your downtime, or even on vacation, it may be because you feel that you don’t have control over your time. In other words, you may be feeling stressed because you don’t own your time. 
  • If you have a job you don’t love, you will find yourself trying to work around it to do the things you do love. 
  • When you say “I don’t have time”, it actually means that you do have the time – it’s just that you have committed your time to something else. 
  • Taking back control of your time requires you to be intentional with your time.


[QUIZ] Is your time really yours? 6 questions to guide your mid-year reset. 

  1. Is there something else you’d rather be doing with your time?
  2. Do you want to be in control of your time?
  3. Are you not tired of asking permission for what you can do with your time? 
  4. What would you do if you had 100% control of your time? 
  5. Have you ever thought how much of your life is dictated by others? 
  6. How can I take back control of some of my time and figure out what works for me?


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